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User talk:Vidyu

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This is one argument you wrote:

  • Direct elections increase the scope of accountability in the president: direct elections increase the accountability of the president as compared to those elected by the state heads wherein such accountability gets restricted.The current system involving 27 heads of state in the council represented by a rotating president and also the presidents of the commission and the parliament leaves it unclear as to who speaks for the EU. The EU presently has too many "presidents" and they all are weak in terms of competence says Jo Leinen the chairman of the parliament's constitutional affairs committee.

Here's what I changed it to:

  • Electing an EU president directly will increase accountability. Direct elections increase the accountability of the president as compared to those elected by the state heads wherein such accountability gets restricted. The current system involving 27 heads of state in the council represented by a rotating president and also the presidents of the commission and the parliament makes it unclear who actually speaks for the EU. Clarifying who speaks for the EU will make it easier to hold that person accountable.

Comments:

  • When you put the brackets around an argument "claim" (the first sentence), you make it into a page (an "argument page"). This is great, but only when you have a quotation in-hand (supporting the argument) that you will actually put in that new argument page.
  • Your original claim did not fully summarize the argument. I added the context that we are talking about an EU presidency.
  • Your writing is very good. Make sure, though, that your argument summaries stay on the isolated point. The last sentence of your argument talked about too many presidents and that they are all too weak in terms of competence. This is a different argument (a good one though). Just make sure to isolate arguments.
  • VERY WELL DONE. I'M IMPRESSED WITH YOUR WRITING STYLE. -- Brooks Lindsay 15:36, 27 June 2008 (CDT)

More

More comments:

  • When you put brackets around an argument claim you create an argument page. Only do this when you have quotations to put in those argument pages. They were red because there was no content in the new pages. They turn blue if you put content in them. More soon. Good work. -- Brooks Lindsay 19:39, 29 June 2008 (CDT)

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